Thursday, January 25, 2007

Here's something I've noticed

In fast food restaurants, customers rarely sing along with the radio, but employees often do.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Well, I forgot to post twice yesterday, so I guess I'll be posting twice today. Here's a picture of Indiana University.


Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Well, I forgot to post twice yesterday, so it looks like I'll be posting twice today. Here's a picture of a tree.


Wednesday, January 3, 2007

While my pizza is cooling, I'll just fill you in on why skinny people are causing delays on the subway. It's because people are going on crash diets and then fainting, so the train stays put while they wait for the paramedics to arrive.

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Resolution! Resolution! Write in blog every day! Eight minutes left! Almost forgot! Resolution! Resolution! What should I—

So, I hear skinny people are slowing down the subways. How 'bout that. Huh. Um... So, I hear yo mama's so fat, if she stood on some scales, they would indicate that a very large person indeed was standing on them. Ahem.

Resolution! Resolution! Less than six minutes! Panic! Distress! Catastrophe! Say, have you ever noticed how a lot of Europeans pronounce catastrophe as "CAT-a-stroff"? How 'bout that. Huh. Indeed.

Well, I guess that's substantial enough to justify hitting the ol' "publish" button. But perhaps you might first enjoy a delightful poem.


THREADING THE WICKETS

When I was a boy
Growing up in England
In the late 1920's
We played a lot of croquet.

Monday, January 1, 2007

Two hours ago I was standing on what might justifiably be described as a "grassy knoll" at 59th Street and 7th Avenue. I was with a large group of people—several hundred at least—who looked like they knew what they were doing. "Do you see it? Can you see it? Where is it? Is that it? I can't see it!" This was the gist of the collective conversation. I thought I could see it, but then fireworks were going off and I realized, nope, didn't see it. No ball-droppage action for Matt tonight. Oh well, at least I was on the very edge of the crowd, enabling me to beat a hasty retreat. Now I'm on the edge of my seat—quite literally—watching an episode of The Twilight Zone I haven't seen before. Happy 2007, gentle readers. Be adequate.