Here is an ad for the kind of job I would like. Whenever I find an ad for a job I might want to do, this is what happens. I read the description and say, that looks like fun. Then I read the Requirements and see how obvious it is that I will never get that job. For example:
On Figure Photographer
Bluefly.com, a leading online merchant offering top designer and name brand apparel and accessories at significant discounts, is looking for an On Figure Photographer to join our Production team. This position will report to the Director of Production / Photography Operations.
- Photograph Men’s & Women’s apparel on model in a fully-digital production environment for Bluefly’s online catalog, maintaining the quality and consistency of the Bluefly brand.
- Team with others in Production to insure product is organized and efficiently moved through the production process, ensuring that the number of products photographed meets the needs of the business.
- Work hours for this position will be weekdays and could include some nights and weekends.
- BA Degree
- 3-5 years of on figure photography experience
- The ability to work with Photo Producer and Art Director to reach needed shot count
- Similar consumer products experience a plus.
- Must be up to date with current digital photography technology, have strong studio lighting skills and model direction.
- Experience shooting with digital cameras tethered.
- Knowledge of Mac applications including Photoshop, OS X, RAW file conversion, Capture One and basic photo editing skills.
- Excellent communication, verbal, written, and interpersonal skills.
- Ability to work in fast-paced and growing environment.
In addition to providing a dynamic, highly motivated environment, Bluefly offers its employees: Competitive salary, health and dental benefits, 401K, commuter/parking benefits and an employee discount.
Bluefly is an equal opportunity employer.
Now, let me tell you how my qualifications compare with the above, item for item:
- BA Degree
- 0 years of on figure photography experience. This is the first time I've even heard the term "on figure".
- The ability to work with Photo Producer and Art Director to reach needed shot count. (I guess. This is pretty vague.)
- No consumer products experience.
- Am not up to date with current digital photography technology, do not have any studio lighting skills and model direction.
- No experience shooting with digital cameras tethered. What the hell is a tethered camera anyway?
- No knowledge of Photoshop, RAW file conversion, Capture One and who knows what you even mean by "basic" photo editing skills.
- Mediocre communication, verbal, written, and interpersonal skills.
- Very little ability to work in fast-paced environment.
Well, would you hire me?