Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Are you like me? Do you remember the days of the great salmon liners? Huge ships transporting nothing but salmon—tons of them—up and down the coasts of this nation. I practically grew up on a salmon liner. I was shaving salmon on these salmon liners at the age of four. But why do salmon need to be shaved? I'll tell you. But first I'll distract you with an irrelevant anecdote about my days as a styrofoam coffee cup. Yeah, I was inanimate there for a while back in the mid-seventies. About four inches tall, white, cylindrical. Come to think of it, I still inhabit those qualities in my human form. But as a cup, I was more pure in these aspects.

As for the anecdote, I've already forgotten what it was, so let's go back to the salmon liners of my youth. The one I remember spending the most time on was a converted aircraft carrier. I don't remember its name. I only remember that I was...

I'm sorry, I just—I can't continue. The memories are welling up like water from a well. So sorry! Let's reschedule. Are you available Friday morning? Say 5:30? Just stay up the night before so that you won't oversleep and miss our appointment. I look forward to meeting you. Should we go to a movie or something? All day I've been thinking about salmon, I mean movies, about going to a movie. But which one? I think I heard about a documentary on salmon liners. Or maybe it was just a documentary about salmon. Or maybe it wasn't a documentary at all, perhaps it was the second half of a doubleheader between the Braves and Marlins. Nothing sounds less interesting. Ooh! I know, we could go to a doubleheader, maybe one between the Twins and Angels. No? Well, you think it over. In the meantime I need to go shopping for some soft luggage.

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